BFL - Day 24

Beginning Date: April 2, 2007
Ending Date: June 23, 2007

Day 24 -

Did my bike workout this morning and went 5.21 miles. My legs were very tired and sore while I was doing it and I've worked up quite a sweat. While I was riding I was thinking about running and why I think it is such a better workout. I'm not sure what the answer is - I think because I really feel it the next day, maybe because it is so incredibly difficult for me and it is a challenge, maybe because I have absolutely no breath while I'm doing it. I'm not sure.

I'm encouraged by the message board on bodyforlife.com. The notes there are positive and nice to read. Others are struggling with the same things I am, apparently. I'm frustrated with things right now - still very positive about it all, but frustrated. With BFL, with Dave's job, with life in general. I feel like there is very real hope that things in each of those areas will improve - that I will notice some changes in the way my body looks, that Dave will someday earn enough money to pay our bills, that there will be a time where I'm not handcuffed by the ages of my children. I have hope in all of these areas, but I'm frustrated by the fact that each thing is going to take some amount of time to achieve. I want it all right now. I'm sick of struggling. I'm sick of it. I don't want to work anymore, I don't want to look to the future and know it will get better anymore - I want it to be better now. I sound like I'm whining - and I'm really not, I'm just frustrated and feeling a need to put it into words. Tim said on Saturday night that even in the best of times we can look around and say, "It DOES get better than this!" (meaning heaven). I need to remember that it will get better than this and focus on the important things rather on my frustrations.